Fern, the profaneity-heavy Rattikin and bookseller first appearing in Bookshops and Bonedust, has run her quiet little shop in her quiet seaside village for years. Now, offered a change of scenery and a potential end to the ennui she’s fallen into in recent years, she transplants herself to the city of Thune to start anew beside a long-absent friend’s coffee shop. What could be a better pairing? (She hates the taste of coffee.) Surely a charming renovation montage will cure what ails her! (Not in the slightest.)
Given good advice one night to tell said old friend this leads to Fern imbibing heavily in some liquid courage and crawling into the wagon of the famed Astyrx One-Ear, the famous enturies-old warrior who saved Fern’s life back when Fern was on her way to Thune, and then promptly leaving without even a goodbye. (Why her wagon is in Thune is never really explained all that well, but a small plot point does not detract.)
Of course, Fern does have some regrets when she wakes up miles from home and in the copmany of both Astyrx and Zyll, the chaos-goblin with a fondness for silverware that Astyrx is taking in for a bounty. In fact, one of the largest bounties anyone has ever seen, for reasons that aren’t too clear other than, “when Zyll comes around total insanity, chaos, and destruction follow.”
Now that Fern is along for the ride (despite Astyrx telling her she can go; Fern doesn’t because….reasons), she and Astyrx will have to contend with the bevy of other warriors that all want a crack at that bounty, a chaos-goblin that comes and goes as she sees fit (“We goes when is time to be somewhere else” is Zyll’s motto; she’s like a deranged Nanny McPhee), and quickly growing pile of apology letters back to that old friend taking up space in her bag, will Fern find out who exactly she is when she’s stepped off the cliff and can’t see the ground below?
This was an enjoyable book, but I still think the first book, Legends & Lattes, was the best in the series. I think a small part of the problem I had with Fern is that she reminded me a little too much of myself; I’m feeling a little adrift and dissatisfied with my own life right now. Zyll gave me the impression throughout most of the book that if Vash the Stampede from Trigun and Betty from Rat Queens (man, I miss that comic) had a baby and let Stitch from Lilo & Stitch raise it on a steady diet of Pixy Stix, she’d be what that baby would grow to be. This is in no way a bad thing, because she luckily came down on the “quirky yet enjoyable” side of the spectrum, not the “Oh Lord, she’s a hoot, could someone shoot her already?” side. I enjoyed both Zyll and Astryx as characters, and I hope that if Baldree continues this series past a trilogy, he’ll include one or both of them in later adventures. The conclusion to the whole bounty thing is worth the price of admission between those two characters alone. Nigel and Breadlee both got real old, real fast; those are two characters I could have done with less of; they are proof that magical talking swords are not always the cool and impressive object that Pop Culture makes them out to be. Questions do abound though. What happens to Fern’s bookshop? Does Tandri take it over, or does Fern sell it and pay Viv and Tandri back? What happens to Potroast? (If Fern abandoned him, I am starting the #justiceforPotroast movement.) And other than snarky outlook on life and smelling nice, what can Quillin really offer Fern? I personally would have chosen differently in regards to Astyrx, but that’s just me. The profanity, contrary to another review I read elsewhere, does not really detract from the story; I think it’s said just enough to be for appropriate effect, and not just “look at how grown up I am, using all the naughty words!” I appreciated the Penitent Rattikins, and their Abbess’ point of view of why they pray to their many-tentacled God; I can know never look at Cthulhu again without thinking of a petulant toddler throwing a fit because everyone is ignoring him. The action scenes are exciting enough, and certainly well written; the only thing that I will say is that between this book and Love Never Dies, I apparently have vastly overestimated how long it would take to die from a wound to the stomach. Apparently according to Bradlee and Lloyd Webber, it’s maybe 5 minutes, tops. The verdigaunt and the greenlings were described in a properly creepy way, and I would love to see this book given a cinematic adaptation just to see how someone like Guillermo del Toro would actualize them.
All in all, I would recommend picking this book up if you’ve read the rest of the series, and if not, pick up the first two (Legends & Lattes and Bookshops & Bonedust) and read those first. Not only do they give you the necessary backstory to this book, but they’re enjoyable reads on their own.