Cbr17bingo Rec’d (2 bingos) This book was a staff pick/rec at my local bookstore
The Collected Regrets of Clover is a novel about death and grief and about friendship and love. Main character Clover is a 30-something living in New York. She has had a unique connection to death since she was a child, but as an adult she is now struggling with loneliness and grief. A new job and a series of events could potentially take Clover in a direction she has long desired, or they could lead to hurt and disappointment, something Clover has worked hard to avoid her entire life. Is it better to play it safe or take a risk?
Clover’s connection to death began when she was a child. Her kindergarten teacher dropped dead during class, and her parents died tragically while traveling. As a result, Clover went to live with her grandfather in New York. Her grandfather was a college professor, a biologist who taught Clover about careful observation. He shared with her his love of books and birdwatching, and the two developed a very close, loving relationship. Clover, however, never really had friends at school; kids thought she was odd because of her interest in death. In college and beyond she studied “thanatology,” which is the study of death and cultural practices surrounding it. She went abroad, enjoying her travels and coursework, but while away for a year, her grandfather died. Clover has felt enormous guilt for not being there when it happened, and she now works as a “death doula.” A death doula works with the terminally ill and dying to help prepare them for death. She is good at it, and over the years she has kept several journals, entitled confessions, advice and regrets, in which she notes revelations her clients have imparted before death. Clover occasionally consults her journals for ideas of things she should try, things her clients never got around to doing, but in reality Clover is avoiding the real world. Her best friend is an 87 year old man from her building who was friends with her grandfather. Clover has never had a date or a kiss. She finds herself watching her favorite romcoms over and over again, and occasionally spies on the couple across the street who seem to have a loving relationship. On a visit to a death cafe (a gathering for folks interested in talking about death, sharing fears or looking for information), she meets a guy named Sebastian whose beloved grandmother is terminally ill. He takes an interest in Clover, but she is wary. Meanwhile, a new tenant named Sylvie moves into her building, a friendly young woman who wants to get to know Clover and is not put off by finding out what Clover does for a living. But Clover is nervous about opening herself up to friendship.
These relationships with Sebastian and Sylvie are a challenge to Clover. Part of her wants to run and hide, but both of these people are persistent, and Clover has to admit to herself that she does want to have friends, and if that is so, then she must put herself out there and be uncomfortable. Clover’s life gets more complicated when she becomes the death doula for Sebastian’s grandmother Claudia. Claudia is a fascinating character, who becomes something of an inspiration for Clover. As Claudia nears death, she will reveal more of her life to Clover, having an impact that no previous client ever had on her.
I was a bit wary of this novel when I started reading it because it seemed reminiscent of The Maid, which I did not particularly like. In both novels, we have a protagonist whose social skills are terrible, although Clover is not the caricature that the main character of The Maid is. And both characters are orphaned at a young age and raised by a grandparent, but The Collected Regrets of Clover is a better novel. There is a Hallmark/romcom vibe to it, which – in a surprise to myself – was welcome. The world is a grim place these days, and I think there are probably more people like Clover out there than we realize. Overall, The Collected Regrets of Clover was a surprisingly sweet novel given so much of it deals with death.