I heard an interview with the author of this book just before it was published and knew from that interview I wanted to read this book. I am really glad I did. It is extremely raw and brutal but so powerful and real. Mailhot does not give two shits if you like her or not and thank god she doesn’t because the truth of the story is what makes it amazing.
The book is basically a stream of consciousness letter to her white boyfriend, the first part of which was written from a mental hospital. This style does take a little time to get used to, but the once I got into it the book flew by. Nothing is off limits here, Mailhot talks about her life, good parts and bad parts, and what is in her head. She talks very, very bluntly about being a Native American woman in a white man’s world. She talks about what is happening in her head when she is cutting herself and having a manic episode. She talks about her sons, and you can feel her love for them through the pages like another character.
Mailhot is also an inspiring woman. She is very real and forward with the problems she is dealing with and how her past shaped her and that life is really not easy. Yet she is moving forward, she isn’t giving up, not in an inspiring, movie of the week way where the music swells and all is right with the world as the screen fades to black on her smiling face. She is moving forward in a way that knows things will never be perfect, there will always be a lot broken, but the drive to try to express herself and make a good life for her kids, and maybe even find a solid place in the world for herself.
This is a really beautiful book. I am so glad I read it. I have a feeling I could gain even more from a reread down the road after I’ve had a chance to digest it a little.