An insult to avocado toast - A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness
F*ck the Police - The Trespasser by Tana French
I just … didn’t care - The Ensemble by Aja Gabel
I’m not in the habit of boring people with my biography - A Fine Imitation by Amber Brock
Pain could be measured, whereas love often couldn’t even be located. - Dunbar by Edward St. Aubyn
A guide on how to cram every known stereotype in one single book - Motherland by G.D. Abson
Perfectly fine, but not for me - Sunburn by Laura Lippman
So close! - Artemis by Andy Weir
Gettin’ Bizzy - Bizzy Mizz Lizzie by David Shannon
Not Any Great Things - Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult
A little spoilier and crankier than I planned - The Crossing Places by Elly Griffiths
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ - Baptism of Fire (The Witcher #5) by Andrzej Sapkowski
This is her home now–of her own free will. - The Snow Goose by Paul Gallico
Fifty shades of f*cked up - Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James
Thank you, Julie Murphy, for continuously not sucking. - Meet Cute by Jennifer L. Armentrout, Dhonielle Clayton, Katie Cotugno, Jocelyn Davies, Huntley Fitzpatrick, Nina LaCour, Emery Lord, Katharine McGee, Kass Morgan, Julie Murphy, Meredith Russo, Sara Shepard, Nicola Yoon, Ibi Zoboi
Three potentially good stories smashed into one mediocre novel - Sisterland by Curtis Sittenfeld
Fox and the Bike Ride - Fox and the Bike Ride by Corey R. Tabo
The Billionaire and the Manic Pixie Dream Girl, part 9,342 - Scotland or Bust by Kira Archer
Nobody’s Perfect - The Perfect Mother by Aimee Molloy
40: Ugh. I do not like the “cool, caustic sarcastic girl” trope. - Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli
34: White men who think they’re allies (but still negging and objectifying you) are the worst. - Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
Wibbly wobbly timey wimey creepy - The Time Traveler's wife by Audrey Niffenegger
He was aware that he was not completely sane, so he kept himself in rigid check, playing both jailer and prisoner. - You Were Never Really Here by Jonathan Ames
Generic, derivative YA fantasy in disguise. - Children of Blood and Bone (Legacy of Orïsha, #1) by Tomi Adeyemi
If Gaslight and Single White Female had a baby. - Tangerine: A Novel by Christine Mangan
“There is an English dream of a warm summer evening on a branch-line train” - The Kingdom By The Sea by Paul Theroux
I really wanted to like this, but… - Dust by Joan Frances Turner
Edie Is Ever So Helpful or Not…. - Edie Is Ever So Helpful by Sophy Henn
Maybe it Flew Over My Head - Kingdom Come by Mark Waid, Alex Ross
And We’re off to Bed - Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Car by Kate Dopirak
To have strings, like everyone else. - The Music Shop by Rachel Joyce
You can’t go home again - A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
Felt Like the Sam-Frodo part of The Two Towers But On Mars: Or, It’s a Rock, I Get It, Can We Get to Someone or Something Interesting? - Red Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson
I got to find my baby - Castle in the Air by Diana Wynne Jones
Decent beginning + cool idea still manages to = meh - After Long Silence by Sheri S. Tepper
“The past is relevant only as data.” - Altered Carbon by Richard K. Morgan
Come and get it - Year Zero: A Novel by Rob Reid
The past and present was fun, the future was not - A Visit from the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan
A Narwhal and Jelly Book - Peanut Butter and Jelly (A Narwhal and Jelly Book #3) by Ben Clanton
Theocons and Privatizing War - Blackwater: The Rise of the World's Most Powerful Mercenary Army by Jeremy Scahill
Sci Fi crime - Places in the Darkness by Chris Brookmyre
What I eventually came to understand, about San Francisco, was that I was immersed in beauty and barred from seeing it - The Mars Room by Rachel Kushner
Is Rick Riordan Finally Wearing Out? - The Burning Maze (Trials of Apollo 3) by Rick Riodran
Elephant & Piggie Like Reading, Do you? - Elephant & Piggie Like Reading! - The Itchy Book! by Mo Willems
monkey frown.gif (actual gif in post) - The Time of Contempt (The Witcher #4) by Andrzej Sapkowski
Well, that was disappointing - The Book of Etta by Meg Elison
When Box meets Circle - Box Meets Circle: Pixar Animation Studios Artist Showcase by Aaron Hartline
Between Thor: Ragnarok and Infinity Wars, I Don’t Have Much Patience for Thor as an Evil Villain - Hammered by Kevin Hearne
This was a lovely and well-written story that I REALLY didn’t like. - A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles
Snogging means kissing - Angus, Thongs, and full-frontal snogging by Louise Rennison